CURLY:
The US Navy
Sent over a crew for us to train,
And we taught them all their stuff
On the R.80,
A topping little airship with beautiful lines
Designed by a young man called Wallis.
He hadn't copied
Some old Zeppelin design;
She was as modern as a flapper
With an Eton Crop.
A pretty piece of goods,
And did as handsome as she was.

The Yankees were a jolly crowd
Who pulled more than their weight.
And it was the first time
I'd ever met a black chap;
Well, pretty soon
We were all changing hats.
If I had known, I could have warned them
That their new ship
Was a first-rate deathtrap.

The officer in charge of the tests,
Name of Pritchard,
Guessed she was a bad'un.
Ordered a sensible dozen test flights,
Cautious and easy.
The Royal Airship Works refused;
They said four would be enough;
The Americans were waiting.
They worked her up too fast,
Trying to get a record,
And she flexed and bent
And gave everyone the willies.
Our General Maitland
Didn't like what he saw
And backed Pritchard up,
But the Air Ministry overruled them;
They wanted those dollars so badly.
You could almost hear them...

CHAIRMAN:-
If you ask me,
Some of our flying chaps
Are getting to be real old women.

SENIOR COMMITTEEMAN:-
Over cautious...

JUNIOR COMMITTEEMAN:-
Safety mad...

CHAIRMAN:-
Dare one say it: windy!

CURLY:-
The last acceptance flight was packed:
A double crew of British and Americans,
A rich cargo of notables,
And Pritchard and Maitland.
But why the hell did they agree to fly?
You may well ask...

OFFICER:-
We were Service, d'you see?
Follow orders; don't make waves;
Keep your eyes on your duty.
We survived the War
And now we're hopelessly, helplessly,
Hideously brave.
Anything else
Would be letting the side down;
Anything else was never discussed;
Anything else was the unspeakable thing,
The final taboo.

It's the silence that kills you.
Don't break the silence.
It's the silence that kills you.
Don't break the silence.
Don't break the silence.
Don't break...

CURLY:-
Flying over Hull, thousands watching,
Some idiot decides to try
Emergency turns.
Hard Starboard rudder!..
Hard Port rudder!...
A shrieking of aluminium...
Her feeble ribs snap like twigs;
She cracks in two like a blown egg,
And tiny men spill out like a dust...

And two gigantic, glowing,
Chinese paper lanterns
Settle in the Humber mud.
All dead but five;
The Captain survived, just,
But he was kept well away
From the Enquiry. It was understood...

SENIOR COMMITTEEMAN:-
Let sleeping dogs...

JUNIOR COMMITTEEMAN:-
Least said soonest...

CHAIRMAN:-
Laundry in public...

SENIOR COMMITTEEMAN:-
Not in the National Interest...

JUNIOR COMMITTEEMAN:-
De Mortuis...

CHAIRMAN-
Spilt milk...

SENIOR COMMITTEEMAN:-
No-one to blame...

JUNIOR COMMITTEEMAN:-
One of those things...

ALL:-
Kismet!

CHAIRMAN:-
Just send the bill for the whole damn thing
To the USA!